Online EFT Couples Therapy in San Diego

(And all of California and Arizona)

You just want to be on the same page again

Helping marriages & partnerships… even family and friends!

Relationships make or break us.

You are tired of the constant arguing

The revisiting of issues without really solving the problem, or that feeling of loneliness despite being in the same room.

Another night going to bed and not speaking to one another

Arguing into the early morning does not feel good. Things were said and you worry if things will ever get better.

Feeling disconnected is the worse

Relationships are hard work and when they cause us pain, it can feel like the end of the world. You don’t have to navigate this alone.

Reaching out is hard

I know reaching out for couples therapy can bring up all sorts of feelings. But it is worth it. I can help.

My Therapeutic Style in Couples Therapy

Not only am I a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I am also a trained Emotionally Focused Therapist who likes to blend practical skills from Gottman Method, both of which are evidence-based and have been proven to help people heal from the hurt and create stronger bonds with one another. EFT therapy is also really great for families!

Common Couples Therapy Issues:

  • Communication struggles & intimacy struggles

  • Physical and emotional affairs

  • Where one or both partners have ADHD or neurodiversity traits

  • Premarital counseling, un-coupling, and co-parenting therapy

  • Adjusting to being new parents & PMADS

  • Making sense of different cultures and upbringings

I am an LGBTQ+ affirming therapist who provides a space for all relationships. I am kink and sex friendly and will not shy away from exploring any issue that is a struggle in your relationship.

Couples Therapy in Phoenix & San Diego

(All of California & Arizona)

Let’s talk about race and culture.

I have a soft sport for marginalized couples and mixed-race couples. As a Latina therapist married to a Japanese American, I understand not only from my clinical work but from my lived experience how the blending of cultures can create tender spots within a relationship.

Let’s explore those messages from childhood.

I work with couples online in California & Arizona who often wonder about how much of their family origin stories and different backgrounds play a role in the struggles that they face in their partnerships.

Couples therapy for parents struggling with PMADS

Being a new parent brings up a lot for people, new parents are often triggered by a lot of different things. Adjusting to being a new parent is hard and bringing home a new baby can put a serious strain on the relationship. As a new parent you are probably exhausted, fighting about who changed the baby last, and really are struggling with boundaries around people wanting to visit the baby. When was the last time you felt like you and your partner where on the same page? As an EFT Latina couples therapist, I can help you overcome PMADS and help your relationship thrive. You deserve to feel understood and cared for by your partner, let me help you get there.

What does couples therapy for PMADS look like?

Going to couples therapy for Perinatal or postpartum mood and anxiety disorder can be a transformative experience people who are struggling with PMADS. It provides a safe and supportive space to navigate the complexities of this challenging time. Through joint sessions, couples learn effective communication skills, develop strategies to support each other, and find ways to cope with the difficulties that arise. Ultimately, couples therapy offers a valuable opportunity for partners to strengthen their bond, enhance their understanding of one another, and work towards building a resilient and loving family unit.

Individual therapy treatment might be what is needed depending on several factors. As a trained EMDR therapist I can support you in overcoming deep pain and trauma that might be a result or somehow stirred up during this challenging time.

You deserve to feel lighter. Couples therapy for PMADS in San Diego, California or in Phoenix, Arizona, can really help you feel like you and your partner are a team again.

Family Therapy in San Diego For Adults

(All of California & Arizona)

Going to therapy with another person can be a game-changer.

Sometimes individual therapy can only get you so far. Let’s create a space to heal alongside a sibling, parent, or friend. Maybe there was a big fight and now things are not the same and are awkward. You miss how it used to be. Maybe it has never been that great and you are tired and want a closer relationship.

I can help you. I provide family therapy to pairs of people in California and Arizona, meaning that I can help up to two people who are related to one another heal from past hurt and create a change within their relationship. I only serve two people at a time, as I find more than two to be difficult in online therapy. 

Common Family Therapy Issues:

  • Adult children repairing the relationship they have with their parents

  • Adult siblings building a stronger bond with one another

  • Adults from the same family trying to make sense of a chaotic family system

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy: An Attachment Focused Approach

EFT Attachment-Focused Therapy for Couples: Strengthening Connection and Resolving Conflict


EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) attachment-focused therapy is a powerful approach to couples therapy, where root issues are addressed for longer lasting results.

EFT therapy is rooted in the belief that secure attachment is vital for a healthy relationship, EFT therapy aims to create a safe and supportive space that promotes emotional connection and intimacy, where old “dysfunctional communication” patters are identified and addressed.

Therapists trained in EFT work with couples to identify negative interactional patterns, explore underlying emotions and needs, and foster new patterns of engagement to cultivate empathy, rebuild trust, and gain a deeper understanding of each other.

EFT can help you get to the real root of the issue, not just a quick fix approach to couples therapy.

EFT therapy is also how I work with adult family pairs, it really works for a wide range of issues, helping us create relationships that feel good.

Common issues addressed in EFT couples therapy

  • Feeling distant and feeling like the person you share a bed with is a stranger

  • Feeling like you are having the same argument over and over again

  • Struggling with “me-ness” and “we-ness” with in your relationship

  • Lack of joy, fun, and play with your partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Worried about how to approach any topic with your partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend, for fear that it will turn into an argument. 

  • Feeling like you are struggling with the four horsemen as discussed in Gottman Couples Therapy : criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stone walling

  • Feeling like you are struggling with Emotionally Focused Therapy Demon Dialogues: Freeze and Flee, the Protest Polka, and Find the Bad Guy

  • Feeling like conflicts always end in shutting down, tears, a holding grudges

  • Having a feeling like this reminds you about your childhood home or a relationship that you have with your mother or father

  • Wondering if culture, ethnicity, race, religion, sexual identity and orientation, micro and macro aggression or traumas, might be impacting your relationship with your partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend 

  • Feeling like a past toxic relationship continues to impact how you show up in your current relationship with your  partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Inability or difficulty with being able to feel calm and emotionally safe around your  partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Struggling with feelings of co-dependency or too much independence from you  partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Difficulty with communicating with your partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Feeling anxious, overwhelmed, depressed, or avoidant when needing to talk with your partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Trouble with sex and intimacy, not being able to have conversations about sex and intimacy with your partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend

  • Wanting to talk with your  partner, spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend about uncoupling, divorcing, or breaking up

The Process

Consultation

After filling out my contact form, I will get back to you to set up a time to speak for about 10-15 minutes. During this call, we will explore if I am the right fit to help you reach your goals. The first consultation is free.

Intake

Next we schedule our intake session. I will set up your online portal where forms and sessions can be accessed. A card must be on file prior to our first session. Our first session is all about exploring what is going on and how therapy can help.

On-going

We will come up with measurable goals to get you the life you deserve. Therapy can make things feel worst in the beginning. This work isn’t easy and I will support you along the way. On average I see people for 6-9 months.

Hey there, I’m Elisa Blair!

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist + Founder of Mindfully Minding Me Therapy

I help people break cycles. My specialty is couples counseling, especially for those who are BIPOC, in interracial partnerships, 1 and 2 gens wanting to break family cycles to step into a more peaceful way of doing life. I also offer depth work with individuals, helping people rewire their nervous system because traditional talk therapy sometimes is not enough when we are dealing with generational trauma.

I work with people all over San Diego, from Little Italy to Chula Vista, to La Jolla, and really all over California since I practice 100% online therapy. That means I can see people from Los Angeles to Fresno to San Jose, and San Francisco. And all while my clients get the convenience and comfort of having therapy right in their own living room.

I work with people all over Arizona from Flagstaff to Phoenix to Tucson 100% online therapy. Since I am dually licensed, I can see people who reside in both states or find that they travel often. And all while my clients get the convenience and comfort of having therapy right in their own living room.

Check out my about page to see if we are the right fit, explore my specialties page to see if I can help you break generational patterns and step into a more peaceful life. Ready to set up a free consultation?