What is Little “t” Trauma?
Maybe you have heard about big "T" and little "t" when talking about trauma, and now you are wondering, wait so is one not as bad? Make no mistake, a little “t” trauma is far from little, and the feelings are often minimized. Little “t” trauma comes with its own hurt and pain. It is time we view trauma as a spectrum, not a yes or no. And acknowledge that people can have a mixture of the two which definitely impacts there healing journey.
When a person thinks about trauma they think big life altering events like a sexual assault, a car accident, or being deployed at war. These and many other big life events are definitely traumatic and can have life long impacts on a person. By the end of this article I hope you gain a better understand about the differences between little “t” trauma and big “T” traumas, and I hope you’ll gain an understanding as to why saying one is worse than the other could greatly hurt those who struggle with being allowed to call what they went through to be traumatic.
I did want to disclose that I am not here to make light of anyone's trauma, this is a sensitive topic. This post is merely meant to open up a conversation and to promote more people into seeking out help for their struggles. Because we should not have to suffer in silence.
First we needs some context, and I want to talk a little bit about what a trauma is, what PTSD is, and what complex-PTSD is.
What is the definition of trauma?
According to the American Psychological Association, trauma is an emotional response to a terrible event and the APA identifies accidents, rape, or natural disasters as examples. There are both short term and long term reactions to trauma. Short term response to trauma can be shock and possibly denial, while longer term reactions can include difficult to manage emotional responses, nightmares, and trouble with daily life such as working or maintaining relationships. Not everyone who has gone through a trauma experiences Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD, but this is something that can certainly develop for some folks.
What is PTSD?
PTSD stands for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, it is the clinical mental health diagnosis given to someone who has experienced a life threatening event and struggles to reintegrate into their life.
Symptoms can include the following:
Intrusive thoughts, memories, dreams
Avoiding things that could remind you about the event
Negative self talk, mood, and perceptions about yourself and the world
Negative changes in cognition such as memory and concentration
Changes in physical and emotional reactions
What is complex PTSD?
Though it is not in Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), complex PTSD, or C-PTSD, has been in conversation for a while now and has been advocated for decades to be considered as a true diagnosis (it was coined by a Harvard researcher in 1988). As a therapist myself, I have come across several cases where PTSD just wasn’t quite what someone had. After doing my research and consulting with others in the field, I started to really consider if C-PTSD was something that could help provide guidance into how to conceptualize the complicated nature of trauma. Trauma like symptoms can absolutely develop from events that are not classical thought about as traumatic.
A person with C-PTSD might show:
Problems with self esteem- somehow a person will start to blame themselves for what happened. Often this logic can bleed into other areas of their life.
Emotional dysfunction-in addition to the fear and sadness that comes with trauma, those who struggle with C-PTSD may have emotional responses that seem blown out of proportion.
Relationship problems-people who struggle with poor sense of self and emotional dysfunction might very well struggle with making and keeping relationships. It might feel like a never ending cycle to someone who is struggling with this condition.
So what is a little “t” trauma?
Now we just covered what a trauma is, what is PTSD, what is complex PTSD, and I would now like to dive into little “t” trauma. Why? Because not all traumas are big life altering events. Someone who goes through a slow burn of hurt instead of a large raging fire, absolutely can still be impacted to the point where now they are struggling with everyday life.
Some smaller “t” traumas can look like:
Moving frequently as a kid
Have an unemotionally available parent
Be told to be more or less of something to fit in
Going through a painful breakup (romantic or platonic)
Living through a pandemic
And having several of these events can really add up against a person’s emotional wellbeing. We are resilient creatures but we aren't immune to repeated hurts.
Now this is not always the case but big “T” trauma can lead to PTSD and “t” trauma can lead to C-PTSD. Again these labels just to help make this concept easier to grasp, but I hope you can see how not being careful can lead to invalidation. Something that keeps people from healing. Big vs Small, regular vs complex. At the end of the day everyone should seek support, and not talk themselves out with “it’s not that bad.”
A little “t” trauma is often a smaller life event, sometimes ongoing that ends up greatly impacting a person. Smaller as in the person's life was probably not threatened. But I kid you not, the impact can really hurt. I want you to think about frequent moves as a kid, being made fun of for wearing braces or having acne, having a difficult parent, or working for a difficult boss. And perhaps living through Covid-19. Even if you did not experience loss of a person or worked on the front lines, you probably had disruption to life, enough so that this stress made it difficult to function at times. A loss of certainty. Many people sought mental health treatment during the pandemic, to cope with the weight of the pandemic. A trend that seems to be here and I hope helps continue to reduce the stigma of receiving mental health support.
It is well researched and known that stress, particularly ongoing stress can impact not only the mental health but the physical health of a person. Children are no exception; stress in childhood can greatly impact a person. Often I will see people in my practice who minimize what they went through as kids, and have the biggest look of feeling seen when I say, “hold up, can you tell me more about it? That sounds like it was rough.” The slowing down and giving space to this stressor or trauma, if you will, allows for someone to take up space and gain much needed validation for something they have minimized for years.
I want you to know that if you have ever felt or thought “at least” before giving yourself a reason as to why it wasn’t that bad, I want you to know that you are allowed to say it affected you. You are more than allowed to validate and seek validation from those you trust about how this experience impacted you. Doing so, does not take away from the hurt of others and their own traumas, big “T” or small “t”. I encourage you to seek support to process your trauma, and to remember that even the “smaller” stuff is worth giving space to.