EMDR Therapy For When Talk Therapy Isn’t Cutting It.
EMDR therapy is one of those therapies that feels like magic, that is coming from a therapist who practices this type of therapy, online in San Diego, and all over California from San Francisco to Los Angeles. I work with couples and individuals who are overcoming trauma and breaking cycles. EMDR is one of those therapies time and time again my clients exclaim, “I am not sure what is happening, but it is working.” This is often followed by tears and expressions of “finally, I feel better.”
I am a pretty eclectic therapist, and EMDR or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing is one of those therapies that are crucial to a person’s healing. Often people get the impression that going to a therapist means that you are going to talk about all your problems and hopefully that brings relief. This is not really the case if you are looking for long-lasting relief for the symptoms that are bringing you to therapy in the first place. EMDR is a therapy that many assume is just for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD, but again this is not the case. Since it’s development, therapists have been using this to treat a wide range of issues, from complicated grief to performance anxiety. As a therapist who treats individuals and couples who have trauma, I find EMDR to help address deep negative core beliefs, messages, and judgments, by reducing the grip these messages have so that people can heal and live life in a place where the past does not continue to hinder them.
3 reason to consider EMDR Therapy
Sometimes talk therapy can feel like you are going in circles, not really addressing the root issues.
EDMR is a somatic therapy meaning that it addresses your mind and body for deeper healing and relief.
EMDR therapy often continues to work well after your session, meaning your progress will be quicker and will help you get to your goals faster.
Keep reading to learn more about the three reasons why you should consider EMDR therapy when talk therapy isn’t working.
Sometimes talk therapy can feel like you are going in circles, not really addressing the root issues.
This is something that as a therapist I have noticed. I have worked with clients, especially in my earlier years when I was not trained in EMDR, that my clients would come in and word vomit, session after session, and would not be making the progress they wanted.
This might be great for those who are really only wanting to explore light issues in therapy, but many of us have high-priority things to address and don’t have the luxury of taking our time, year after year. Maybe you are in therapy because your relationships are crumbling. Maybe you are distracted and not on your A-game at work. Maybe you feel like you are not present and not able to show up in the way you want to for your kiddos and family. This is why I love EMDR therapy and why you should consider talking with a trained EMDR therapist to see if EMDR is right for you.
Maybe you are wondering, why EMDR is so effective when talk therapy might not be working for you. Based on research and over 30 years of use in the field, it seems that EMDR mimics the sleep patterns of REM. This is the phase of sleep that helps you process your day. This is theory but EMDR is scientifically proven to be effective. I can tell you as a therapist who practices EMDR, I have helped people heal traumas that have felt nearly impossible. Our brain is biologically wired to heal, it survives. Sometimes trauma interferes with this natural process and EMDR can help get our brains back on track. Breaking the circle of negative thinking that sometimes talk therapy struggles to heal.
EDMR is a somatic therapy meaning that it addresses your mind and body for deeper healing and relief.
Somatic therapy is a therapy that works with your body not just your mind. This is huge because more and more research is being done to show that stressors and trauma is held in the body. Therefore it only makes sense that talk therapy alone might not be enough to heal trauma. “The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma” by Bessel van der Kolk M.D. is a fantastic book if you are curious about this connection.
During an EMDR therapy session, it is not uncommon for people to experience body sensations such as tightness in their throats, chest, and stomach (common anxiety hot spots) and to find themselves getting hot or crying. This is something that talk therapy does not always address. As a therapist who is trauma-informed and has done extensive training in these types of therapies, I work with the body and teach my clients to listen to what their bodies are telling them. Increasing our awareness in this capacity is often the first step toward true and lasting healing.
Let’s take this a bit further with an example. Think about how your body sends you signals about uncomfortable things. Confrontation. Managing money. Doing new things. Often your body holds onto times in the past, often when we were kids, when things went wrong and our precious body and mind will do whatever it takes to never let that happen again. These survival strategies are often no longer needed as adults and often get in the way of living our lives. For example, confrontation is something that happens all the time and is often needed in order to address issues with our families, friends, and work, but if we avoid we are actually hurting ourselves and not showing up in our best selves for everyone else. EMDR can help address these deep issues to help us unlock past traumas and stressors that are holding us back in life.
Remember “trauma is what happens within you as a result of what happened to you”, a beautiful quote from Gabor Mate.
If you haven't heard of him, I highly suggest you do a YouTube deep dive or get your hands on his latest book, The Myth of Normal. As an online Therapist practicing therapy in San Diego, and all over California from San Francisco to Los Angeles, I have seen just how effective EMDR therapy is for my clients, and it can work for you too.
EMDR therapy often continues to work well after your session, meaning your progress will be quicker and will help you get to your goals faster.
So the pretty amazing thing about EMDR therapy is that it has a way of helping you process your trauma or current big issues even after the therapy session. This is great for those of us who are bad at doing our “homework” (guilty of this myself and I am not apologizing for it). EMDR almost forces us to continue to do “the work” outside of sessions because it increases our thoughts about the situation we are trying to process. It is not upcoming for people to say they had lots of dreams, which I take as a sign of your brain doing the reprocessing, something that the trauma blocked. In other words, more signs that this is working. Yay!
I often encourage people to practice non-judgment of what comes up. They can walk along Mission Trails Regional Park or Balboa Park to more to give themself more space with their thoughts. They can create art or journal. I often ask people to listen to what their bodies need, since their bodies know. Sometimes this is rest, and we work on creating the space for the rest that is needed. Maybe a beach day at La Jolla Shores is what you need following an EMDR session.
Overall, I hope this information was helpful. EMDR is an amazing option for those wanting to get down to the root issues as to why they do what they do. EMDR can help you heal all of you, mind, body, and spirit. Therapy can be expensive and time-consuming, and healing is a lot of work. I urge you to research therapies that will work for your needs and to speak with a therapist who is trained in the areas that you need in order to get the quality care that you deserve. As an online Therapist practicing therapy in San Diego, and all over California from San Francisco to Los Angeles feel free to reach out if you are considering therapy and if you feel like EMDR Therapy is something you are considering.
With Warmth,
Elisa Blair
Hey there, I’m Elisa Blair!
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist + Founder of Mindfully Minding Me Therapy.
My specialty is couples counseling, especially for those who are BIPOC, in interracial partnerships, 1 and 2 gens wanting to break family cycles to step into a more peaceful way of doing life. I also offer depth work with individuals, helping people rewire their nervous system because traditional talk therapy sometimes is not enough when we are dealing with generational trauma.
I work with people all over San Diego, from Little Italy to Chula Vista, to La Jolla, and really all over California since I practice 100% online therapy. That means I can see people from Los Angeles to Fresno to San Jose, and San Francisco. And all while my clients get the convenience and comfort of having therapy right in their own living room.
Check out my about page to see if we are the right fit, explore my specialties page to see if I can help you break generational patterns and step into a more peaceful life. Ready to set up a free consultation?
